09 Oct Tracey’s story
I had Christopher for 11 months. Two weeks before he passed away, he was in hospital with meningitis. He recovered from it, was out of hospital for just 2 days – I put him to bed, and he never woke back up.
I was devastated – my whole world came crumbling down. My husband had also just left us. Everything over the next few days was just a blur. The funeral came and went – and if I’m honest, I can’t remember much about it.
If it wasn’t for my daughter – who was 2 and a half at the time – I don’t know how I would have coped. I knew I had to keep going, for her sake. She wouldn’t leave my side – she had seen her dad leave and not come back, and then her baby brother leave and not come back. She was terrified the same would happen to me.
Every year, we light a candle on his birthday and on the anniversary. That was 31 years ago – and still, to this day, when those dates come around, I end up in tears. Nothing will ever take away the heartache – it just eases over time.
There are many Baby Loss Awareness Week organisations that offer support to anyone affected by pregnancy and baby loss. If you need support, please visit our support page or organisations page to find the right support for you.
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